Thank you ELust, for once again gathering together so much great smut and other sex writing!

 

 

Writing  can be lonely work, and writing smut can be very lonely.  There are no conferences for people who write dystopian fiction about naked sex slaves.  Some people are kind enough (or, very occasionally, mean enough) to rate or review my work, and some people reach out to me, using their own pseudonyms, which I appreciate as far as it goes. 

But then there's Oz Bigdownunder, who  gathers together some of the best erotica and articles about sex and links to them at his monthly magazine, Elust. Knowing that he will provide free publicity for my stories inspires me to get back to work (although in all honesty I haven't finished anything new in a while -- my real life, which has no naked sex slaves in it, interferes).  

The latest issue of ELust, 191, is excellent.  It includes the following:  

Sex News

The Sex Shed, The Sex Shed is looking for brand ambassadors & reviewers!   (Note from JG: Wouldn't you love to be a sex toy influencer?) 

Erotic Non-Fiction

Morgan Destera, What Can I Say…

Tantric Connections, The Longing Beneath Success: Remembering How To Feel

Thoughts & Advice on Sex & Relationships

Tantric Sexual Healing, Tantric Embodiment and the Alchemy of Power: Transforming Desire into Collective Awakening

Kristina J, Let’s Talk About Touch (and Why Communication Is The Sexiest Thing You Can Do)

Awakening Your Inner Essence, The Secret to Lasting Longer Isn’t Control — It’s Connection

Erotic Fiction

B.R.Saiph, Locktober Reward

Jerusalem Mortimer, In the Realm of the Sensei - Prologue 17

Jasmine Gold, Opening chapters of Mindgames, a dark dystopian novel about naked sex slaves  (Note from JG:  You asked for it, you got it -- sample my naked sex slave smut for free!) 

Fern River Club, After the Come-In (Part 1)

Product Reviews

Spices of Lust, Womanizer Peach Review  (Note from JG:  I recently bought a vibrator - not this one -- that I hated.  It had only one setting, which was way too intense for me.  Vibrators are not cheap, and vibrator reviews are key to not wasting your money.)  

Oz Bigdownunder, Nothosaur Avoyo - Centaur Horse Ejaculating Dildo - Review  (Note from JG:  Now that's a review, exactly what i would expect from our hero Oz.)  

Sex Work

Sex worker Search, A Guide to Selfie Photo-Shoots For Sex Workers

Lita Mackenzie, An Imperfect Quick Guide to Finding – and Verifying- a Companion

Ulla Burns, No Safeword for the Soul -Maternal Domination without a script

Sierra Skyy, Feminism and Sex Work; Have We Lost the Plot?

Elizabeth of London, A naughty Nurse

Hellga, Sit On My Face and Tell Me That You Love Me

Book and Movies

Liz Black, Two New Bimbo Releases Are Here - Two Series Completed

History of BDSM, Nine and a Half Weeks (1978)  (Note from JG: Excellent review)

Remember the Zipless Fuck? Modern romance How to Sell a Romance by Alexa Martin will remind you

 

In a book published in 1973 called Fear of Flying, author Erica Jong gave the world the concept of the zipless fuck -- you meet a hot stranger, you have amazing sex with them, there are no repercussions.  Zipless because in this fantasy the sex is so easy that there is no fiddling with the flies on jeans; clothes just fall away.  

SPOILERS:

Towards the end of the novel the narrator, protagonist Isadora, is on a train, sees a hot man, and has an opportunity for a zipless fuck -- and she is horrified.  Who would want to have sex with a complete stranger without any conversation?  It is scary and gross.  

How to Sell a Romance, by Alexa Martin, begins with a zipless fuck and ends SPOILERS

 

with a zipless happily ever after.   

Heroine Emerson goes to a crowded rooftop bar after attending a conference for a fictional MLM skincare company.  (For the uninitiated, MLMs, or multi-level marketing companies, are pyramid schemes aimed at women who invest a lot of money in products but can only make the money back if they recruit other women to sell the products.)  Emerson doesn't know anyone at the bar and is planning to leave but manages to snag a table.  Suddenly an impossibly handsome man asks if he can sit with her. They exchange a few words.  She asks if they can go to his hotel room.  He enthusiastically agrees.  She hasn't had sex is years and he has the biggest cock she has ever seen.  They don't need to ask each other what they like, sex-wise, because I guess they can read each other's minds or because in this world everyone likes the same things so you don't need to communicate.  The magic giant cock brings only pleasure.  

Things go south the next morning when it turns out that magic-cock-man, a/k/a hero Lucas, is writing an expose on the MLM that Emerson is joining.  Apparently in this world no one has ever heard of or researched MLMs because Emerson is shocked -- shocked, I tell you! -- that anyone would dare question the business savvy of investing money she doesn't have in overpriced skincare products in the hope of recruiting other people to sell them.

But, wait, there's more!  Emerson is a sweet as sugar kindergarten teacher who has been recruited into the nefarious MLM by her boss, the principal.  We learn over the course of the book that the principal spends all of her principal-ing time recruiting teachers to the MLM, and firing those who refuse to be recruited or who quit.  I guess the school runs itself, despite what must be incredible turnover?  

And --  you could not have seen this one coming! -- Lucas's daughter is placed into Emerson's kindergarten class.  And, Lucas's ex-wife, mother of Moppet (™) is also in the MLM and is good friends with the principal.  

At any point does anyone in this book say, it is inappropriate for a principal to run an elementary school as a front for an MLM?  At any point in this book does anyone say a kindergarten teacher should not be having sex with the father of a student?  No! and No!  Well, okay, the principal gets fired in the end, not for running the school as a front for an MLM but for getting mad at Emerson for secretly recording their conversations (which is definitely illegal in some states, FYI).  And everyone agrees that Emerson should be able to continue to have sex with Lucas and that Moppet (™) should not have to switch classes.  Yay for the HEA!  

Note from Jasmine Gold: As the name of this blog indicates, I write erotica. Check out my dark, dystopian novel about naked sex slaves, Mindgames. Your darkest fantasies, with a phenomenal plot and characters you will come to think of as beloved friends. Available on Kindle and Kindle Unlimited  and in paperback.  Or read my book of short stories about hot, consensual sex, The Mature Woman's Guide to Desire, available on Kindle and Kindle Unlimited.

 

 

The Unlikely Pursuit of Mary Bennet by Lindz McLeod manages to make both Pride and Prejudice and Regency lesbian love boring

 

The Unlikely Pursuit of Mary Bennet by Lindz McLeod is not the first fanfic book to come out recently that stars Mary Bennet, the annoying middle sister in Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice.  Although I had some issues with the first book about Mary, The Other Bennet Sister by Janice Hadlow, it seems like a masterpiece compared to McLeod's book.

The Other Bennet Sister was true to the Pride and Prejudice world and its characters.  I believed the backstory Hadlow created for Mary as the overlooked and socially awkward but brilliant teen who grew into an adult finding her place in society.  While that book didn't stick the landing, there was nothing about Mary that didn't make sense from her character and circumstances in Austen's work.

In The Other Bennet Sister, as part of her travels Mary visits Charlotte, her sister Elizabeth's best friend, who in Pride and Prejudice had married the very annoying  Mr. Collins.  Mary develops an unlikely but completely platonic friendship with him.  He is lonely in his marriage and is the first person to notice and encourage Mary's intellectual pursuits.  Charlotte, concerned about Mary's effect on her relationship with Mr. Collins, sends her packing.

In The Unlikely Pursuit of Mary Bennet, as the book opens Mr. Collins has just died.  Charlotte has lost the secure future that her marriage promised.  She asks Elizabeth to visit, but Elizabeth sends Mary in her place.  There is frisson.  Charlotte discovers that lesbians exist and that she is one and that Mary is one. A plot that involves much too much discussion of the secret messages conveyed in flowers ensues, and then HEA.

The Mary in this book is not the Mary in Pride and Prejudice.  She is a dull, nice, somehow rich girl with very little personality.  Charlotte was not well enough developed in Pride and Prejudice for the reader to say whether she is the same character as in McLeod's version, but it is impossible to imagine Austen creating a character who is so bland.  (Again with the flowers.)  Her hero's journey -- spoilers if you care -- is that she is hired by a rich gay man to be his gardener, even though she has never done a  day's work in her life and really is unqualified to care for his greenhouses, and then he makes her his heir, and then she wears a pretty dress and reconciles with Mary who she luurves.  

As I wrote here, I found Pride and Prejudice hard going when I first tried to read it.  McLeod's book is harder, and unlike with Pride and Prejudice repeated attempts are unlikely to make it easier.   

Note from Jasmine Gold: As the name of this blog indicates, I write erotica. Check out my dark, dystopian novel about naked sex slaves, Mindgames. Your darkest fantasies, with a phenomenal plot and characters you will come to think of as beloved friends. Available on Kindle and Kindle Unlimited  and in paperback.  Or read my book of short stories about hot, consensual sex, The Mature Woman's Guide to Desire, available on Kindle and Kindle Unlimited.

I am mostly here for modern romance Here for the Wrong Reasons by Annabel Paulsen and Lydia Wang

 

 

I went into modern romance Here for the Wrong Reasons by Annabel Paulsen and Lydia Wang with some trepidation.  First, it's yet another romance set on a reality TV show.  Second, it is jointly written, which is the next thing to being written by committee.  Third, we are told on the first page that the Bachelor (er, Romantic) is the show's "first Ashkenazi Jewish Romantic."  What does this even mean?  That the show has already had a Sephardic bachelor?  Or a Mizrahi bachelor?  Nobody talks like this.  And, it's never a plot point.  Josh has no conversations with any of the contestants (none of whom appear to be Jewish of any variety) about what their religious differences might mean for a relationship.  Or whether anyone believes in God.  Or in what religion they will raise their children.  When the main characters meet Josh's family there is no discussion of religion.  Josh doesn't wear a yarmulke.  He doesn't keep the sabbath.  He doesn't keep kosher.  So what exactly is the point here?

That said, once I got over these hurdles, the book is charming.  Heroine Krystin is a literal rodeo queen -- like, she's been crowned the rodeo queen of Montana (or maybe Wyoming? A square state), and we see how hard she works on her riding skills, which I appreciate.  At the beginning of the book she has not realized she is a lesbian, although on some deeply subconscious level she may know it, and she has come on the show to find true love.

Heroine Lauren is a closeted lesbian.  She is an influencer.  She has come on the show to increase her follower count.  (Weird glitch in the matrix: At the beginning of the book she is a moderately successful influencer -- and we are told she has around 40,000 followers.  That seems pretty damn low to me.  But what do I know?  I hover around 4,500 on Twitter, of which at least ten are real people and not bots.)

Anyhoo, they meet, they mud wrestle, Krystin saves Lauren from a runaway horse, kissy kissy, HEA.  The plot is slight but the book is engagingly written, and I enjoyed it.  

Note from Jasmine Gold: As the name of this blog indicates, I write erotica. Check out my dark, dystopian novel about naked sex slaves, Mindgames. Your darkest fantasies, with a phenomenal plot and characters you will come to think of as beloved friends. Available on Kindle and Kindle Unlimited  and in paperback.  Or read my book of short stories about hot, consensual sex, The Mature Woman's Guide to Desire, available on Kindle and Kindle Unlimited.

Unromance by Erin Connor is an excellent author's-wish-fulfilment modern romance

 

Unromance by Erin Connor is not the first modern romance I've read recently about a romance writer (or other writer) who dates a celebrity.  Despite its common wish-fulfilment-for-the-author plot, Unromance is charming and engaging.

Heroine Sawyer is a romance writer with writer's block brought on by a bad breakup.  She has a meet-cute with hero Mason, a famous actor who is currently in the tabloids for getting dumped, again.  After a one-night stand, they bump into each other and decide they can help each other out -- by reenacting all the biggest romance tropes from romcoms and not falling for each other.  Spoiler: it doesn't work.

But to get it to not work, Sawyer and Mason each have to realize that they need to work on themselves before they can be in a successful relationship.  Sweetly, they each find help from exes who are willing to tell them the truth about themselves.  Sawyer needs to find the courage to share more of herself.  Mason has to find the wisdom to back off.  I loved how their character development meshed.

The only thing that didn't make much sense to me about this book was Sawyer's devotion to staying in Chicago -- an important plot point because Mason needs to move to LA for work.  Sawyer is not from Chicago, she doesn't have many friends there, she is self-employed and works from home, and I never got the sense that there was anything particularly compelling to her about the city.  She just kept saying, "My life is here."  Maybe?  But this was a conflict that added nothing to the plot.  Other than that, no notes.   

 

Note from Jasmine Gold: As the name of this blog indicates, I write erotica. Check out my dark, dystopian novel about naked sex slaves, Mindgames. Your darkest fantasies, with a phenomenal plot and characters you will come to think of as beloved friends. Available on Kindle and Kindle Unlimited  and in paperback.  Or read my book of short stories about hot, consensual sex, The Mature Woman's Guide to Desire, available on Kindle and Kindle Unlimited.

 

Once a Spy by Mary Jo Putney is more of an adventure story than a Regency romance - but it's a really good adventure story

 

I don't really know how to review Once a Spy by Mary Jo Putney.  It's clearly supposed to be a Regency romance, and it has romance elements, but the romance itself has very little plot or tension.  Heroine Suzanne is the widow of a mean French nobleman.  She was captured and lived as a slave in a harem until she escaped, a story apparently told in a different Putney book.  At the opening of Once a Spy she is living as an impoverished seamstress in England.  

Hero Simon has had his own adventures and misadventures working as a spy for the British army during the Napoleonic wars.  Those wars are now in a lull with Napoleon in his first exile.  Simon is a distant relative of Suzanne's late husband, and Simon and Suzanne had known and liked each other years ago.  He tracks her down and impetuously asks her to marry him.

The plot of the romance is that Suzanne and Simon are both so traumatized that neither of them think that they will ever want to be physically intimate ever again.  This makes them well-matched, so Suzanne accepts Simon's proposal.  Simon quickly realizes that he is attracted to Suzanne; it takes several backrubs before Suzanne realizes that she also wants to have sex with Simon.  

Simon and Suzanne are a good couple.  They are nice to each other.  They are honest with each other.  They don't have any stupid miscommunications.  They fall in love.  

The real plot of the book begins when Napoleon escapes his first exile and become emperor of France again.  With war afoot, Simon and Suzanne happen to bump into the head of the English army at a park.  He knows that Simon is one of England's best spies, so he recruits him to go back to spying -- an event that would not have happened if they hadn't been at the same park at the same time.  I call that a lucky coincidence!

Suzanne insists that she accompany Simon behind enemy lines. They sneak around the countryside gathering information.  They steal horses, and a kitten.  

Simon and Suzanne then go on solo missions.  Suzanne happens to meet Napoleon when she is captured and pretending to be a prostitute, and is able to feed him misinformation about English troop movements, which plays a big role in England defeating him at Waterloo. Another lucky coincidence!

Much of this book is overwhelmingly silly.  But it's also fun and charming.  With significantly less romance and significantly enlarged details of the adventure story, it could be great.

 Note from Jasmine Gold: As the name of this blog indicates, I write erotica. Check out my dark, dystopian novel about naked sex slaves, Mindgames. Your darkest fantasies, with a phenomenal plot and characters you will come to think of as beloved friends. Available on Kindle and Kindle Unlimited  and in paperback.  Or read my book of short stories about hot, consensual sex, The Mature Woman's Guide to Desire, available on Kindle and Kindle Unlimited.

Regency romance Project Duchess by Sabrina Jeffries is not the best project

 

Project Duchess by Sabrina Jeffries started as a perfectly adequate Regency romance -- easy to pick up for a few minutes at a time but not hard to put down.  

The main characters, hero Grey and heroine Beatrice, are fine.  Grey is a curmudgeonly duke.  Beatrice is a poor relation who likes to speak her mind, but usually doesn't.  Sparks, plot plot plot.  

But: Grey's back story made no sense whatsoever.  After his father the duke died when Grey was a child, his uncle became his guardian and the trustee of his estate.  When Grey was twelve, the uncle tried to get Grey to sign over to him ownership of unentailed properties.  Grey spent a couple of days teaching himself how to read and understand legal documents, and then refused to sign the documents.  The uncle would lock him in a basement and starve him in an attempt to coerce him, then try to be nice to him in an attempt to convince him, but Grey still refused to sign.

This plot seems bafflingly stupid.  I can't believe that even in Regency England a twelve year old could sign a binding contract.  But if the uncle was trustee, he could sign on Grey's behalf. Sure, he could be sued later for breach of trust (or whatever), but Grey noted in retrospect that if he, Grey, had signed the documents when he was twelve without researching them, as an adult he probably would never have realized that the properties had ever belonged to him.  So if the uncle had signed them over to himself, the result would be the same.

The second worst thing about this book:  It ends on a cliffhanger.  The plot centers on a murder mystery -- which is unresolved at the end of the book.  Even in the epilogue new twists are introduced.  Yes, the first third of the book spends way too much time discussing the extended families of Grey and Beatrice, meaning that this is the beginning of a series, but come on.  Regency romances should not end this way.  Ever.   

Note from Jasmine Gold: As the name of this blog indicates, I write erotica. Check out my dark, dystopian novel about naked sex slaves, Mindgames. Your darkest fantasies, with a phenomenal plot and characters you will come to think of as beloved friends. Available on Kindle and Kindle Unlimited  and in paperback.  Or read my book of short stories about hot, consensual sex, The Mature Woman's Guide to Desire, available on Kindle and Kindle Unlimited.